The blues..

Had a school reunion, was afraid to go cause i wouldn't be able to see her face. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to go because if I went, and she didn't come, I'd end up drinking the night away missing her.

3 pegs of whiskey later.. I knew that i needed to go.. I needed the chance to meet her.. and yet i was shit scared.. Completely terrified. I needed that slap across my face. I needed to slap someone the way i slapped him.

He lent me cash and i left. And i went there. And i saw them all in their full loserness. All wannabes. All hoping to prove to the world that they were happy with their crappy meaningless lives. And it was fun, seeing other ppl like me. And then i saw her. She came through the door. She said hi to a couple of ppl, and then she came and hugged me, and kissed me on my cheek, gently. And I was happy, I was so happy. I wanted to tell her how i felt. I wanted to tell her, to beg her, to come back to me. But i didn't, I couldn't. I loved her too much.

And before I could muster up the courage to tell her how i felt, she was gone. And i was alone, and scared.
I ended up sleeping on the train that night. Too drunk to walk straight.

The sad part is. Im ready to go through all of it again, if i could just have her walk into the door and kiss me on my cheek, just once more.